Who are you Janice and Sarah?
Recently I have made lots of changes to Julie Rowlands Coaching website, including creating two separate areas for the women I love to support – and to help change lives.
Women with Asperger partners, who struggle with low self esteem, poor self confidence and the ongoing consequences of living in a challenging relationship long term,
Mid life women who struggle to move into the next part of life, after years of child rearing and family life, when the kids have left home, and life is very different.
These two areas can appear quite different on the outside, however the issues are remarkably similar even though the cause is different.
Let me explain…
Janice is 52, a trained nurse, married and living at home with her husband. she works part time at the local hospital. Both their kids have left home, and Janice is finding her life has changed so much, she feels dissatisfied and unhappy with her career, she feels exhausted and overwhelmed most of the time. She doesn’t really know what she wants to do, however she absolutely knows she wants to do something different!
Janice feels stuck and sad and lonely, she misses her kids, but she knows they are off starting the journey of their own lives. Janice finds herself dreaming of starting a business of some kind though she doesn’t know what, she goes round and round, thinking dreaming all the while the little voice in her head tells her to get a grip, that she can’t do anything like that, because of course she would fail! ( so says the little voice in her head!)
She constantly battles negative feelings of not feeling good enough, not knowing enough, not doing enough.
Eventually she ‘parks’ the idea and settles for doing what she has always done.
Now let me introduce you to Sarah:
Sarah is also 52, she has been married to her husband Simon, for nearly 25 years. They have 2 children, a son and a daughter, both nearly grown.
Sarah is a trained teacher, and works part time. She has struggled for years with mild depression and anxiety, and has always secretly felt like there is something wrong with her, because although she has tried and tried for years to keep her marriage going, the relationship is still very difficult and hard to understand. Sarah feels invisible and lost, she is at the end of her tether. She feels she cannot continue trying. Her husband Simon is an enigma to her. To others, he is friendly and outgoing, he is chatty and generous, however at home it is a different story.
Sarah’s husband is a controlling, anxious, and angry man at times, with strict rules on how things should be done, and he expects her and the kids to do things his way, unquestioningly, which has led to huge conflict between Sarah and Simon and also with the kids. Sarah has learned that it is best not to aggravate him, as he reacts badly and goes silent and cold for days on end. She feels that he often doesn’t seem to notice her, he is distant and off in his own little world of sports, TV and work. The communication between Sarah and Simon is limited and conversation or emotional connection is non existent.
Sarah runs the home, organizes their social life (which is minimal) finances and the kids needs.
Somehow, Sarah is unable to find the strength to make the tough decision to leave, or make changes. She loves her husband and worries that he may not cope without her to organise him as he seems unable to do so many everyday activities.
Sarah is feels constantly exhausted and she has decided that once the kids have gone, it will be time to end the marriage.
She feels stuck, she has somehow lost herself and does not know where to turn, she feels lonely,unheard and dismissed. Her self esteem is in tatters, and some days she struggles to get herself to work.
Her friends tell her she is very lucky to have such a ‘nice’ husband, and to be grateful and ‘suck it up’! this makes her feel even more alone as she feels there is no one really who understands…
Quite by chance Sarah meets someone who suggests Simon may have something called Asperger’s syndrome. She did some research, asked Mr Google, and whamo, the light comes on and suddenly it all makes sense!
Similarities between Janice and Sarah?
So what are the similarities between Janice and Sarah?
- They both have overwhelming stress in their lives.
- They both are beginning to suffer from stress related health issues.
- They both feel stuck, unable to make any decisions, they worry about what family and friends would say should they make big changes.
- They both feel very alone.
- They both have lost themselves after years of caring for others, and don’t have a clue where to start to make changes.
- They are both bright, compassionate, intelligent women who are unable to get out of their ‘stuckness’, and have settled for a life where they are not able to fulfill their potential.
This is where I can help!
Why? Because I understand personally the problems both these women are dealing with.
I have been there and I have come out the other side so I know how to make the changes that are needed.
I know you need to have support! a bit of hand holding and a bit of guidance.
I know you need to have proven strategies to help and at times, a listening ear to vent to!
I also know it is not easy, however it is possible, and I encourage you to take the first step, if Janice or Sarah sound like YOU!
I can help you rediscover the Who in YOU.
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Lets find the WHO in YOU
How I can help you?
I will help you to become the
‘Wise and Wonderful Woman’
I know you to be!
My Focus is to help you to be NO 1 in Your life
Reconnect with yourself
Take back your life!
take the step that could change your life.
How long will you wait?
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